Presenting The Free, Daily World Cup Newsletter! Group A Preview, The USMNT Roster, Argle Bargle And Yes Virginia, Foofaraw!

I'm going to do this. You can come along. But you don't have to!

Hello all! First off, a brief letter, and explanation why you're getting a second email today. This is something I've been rolling around in the old noodle for a bit, and I decided it's something I wanted to try. I'm still figuring out what it is I want to do, what I can do, and even if all of this has any life whatsoever.

With the World Cup on the horizon, I've decided to write about it here, for free, every day (or as close to it as logistics, sobriety, and sanity will allow), until the tournament wraps up in July. But, to repeat, I'm going to do it for absolutely free! No charge.

But I don't want to drag anyone into it that doesn't want to be. So I'm going to tier the newsletter now. If you just want NHL and Hawks stuff, there's the "Neil Peart" tier you can switch to. You'll still get the same amount of newsletters. You can ignore the shit I've been bothering you with for a while now. That's cool. I get it. You can switch on your accounts page.

But hey, maybe you like all the stuff. Or maybe you just want to support me because I made you laugh once, or I threatened your cat. I do that sometimes. Then you don't have to do a thing! I'll send out a newsletter every morning that has everything I'm doing. I'm calling it the "John Bonham Tier." Don't do a thing, you're already on that!

Anyway, the World Cup newsletter...what I'd like to say, and do, is that I'm going to try and get back to my Second City Hockey roots a bit with it. It might be more for the less intense fan, or the intense fan looking for a different voice. I'll do some deep analysis, sure. But what I'd like to get back to is writing about a sport in the fashion of you and I talking about it at the bar. That was the ethos that drove us way back when. This should feel like you've sat at the pub, watching three World Cup games in a row, and trying to comprehend what you've just seen, no matter how foggy. I'd just like to add some color and spice to anyone's World Cup experience, no matter their level of interest.

If that sounds like your particular flavor of vodka, then I need your help! BlueSky is great for a lot of things, despite its tendency to hate itself (perhaps its most liberal trait), but it really isn't a great vehicle to promote one's work the way Twitter used to be. I won't be going back to Twitter, obviously. The best way to get newsletters and independent media out into the open is sharing and word of mouth. So if you like what you see, and/or know of anyone who will like it, or if there's even a chance of them liking it, please send it along! It's free, after all. Anyone can sign up, and I would like to get as many into my weird little tent (ew) as I can to maybe see what I do in the future, if anything. Forward away!

Right! Let's get to the Group A preview!

Group A - Oxygen Optional

Mexico

Should You Care? They make so much noise you'll have to. Mexico have been international soccer's Dallas Cowboys for a couple decades now. They carry themselves as one of the big boys, there's way too much hype about them, and then they never do shit. They have the same exact World Cup record as their neighbors to the north, having won exactly one knockout game. And theirx didn't even come over a hated rival, like the US's did. Their rep and buzz is akin to anyone living off their top three draft pick status four years later when the team still sucks and their production is still middling.

Do They Care? Oh god yes. They wanted to end the school year early to accommodate the tournament, and the national team and domestic clubs were fighting over the national team pulling players to training camp before the end of the club season. Expectations should be tempered a bit from previous years, but because they'll be at home, but still probably bordering on outlandish. The 48-team pool gives them an even bigger safety net. I'll be saying that about a lot of teams.

Any Dudes? You may remember the name Brian Gutierrez, who used to play for the Fire, and used to play for the US, but traded that in to play for Chivas and play for Mexico. Because he might actually play for Mexico, where as he wasn't going to sniff the US roster. Which gives you some idea of where this Mexico squad is. Obed Vargas was an unholy force for Seattle, which got him a move to Atletico Madrid, where he's been a bonus Johnny Cardoso. Raul Jimenez is still a productive Premier League striker in his mid-30s. Santiago Gimenez is one of the 12 strikers that are currently being chased out of Milan by extremely fashionable AC Milan fans carrying extremely fashionable pitchforks and torches.

How'd They Get Here? Like the other hosts, Mexico haven't had much to do since Copa America two years ago. where they also ate it in the group stage. Maybe Mexico and the US are such big rivals because they're the same thing? Couldn't be. They brought more of a full squad to last summer's Gold Cup, which they won over the USMNT's B to C-team. Their last two friendlies saw them draw both Portugal and Belgium. Which, considering both of them turned the US into a mushy paste, I guess is something. But they're also friendlies.

They Getting Out Of Here? Mexico does have one thing going for them, which is that perhaps no team has a bigger home field advantage. They'll get two of their group games at Azteca, which is 8,000 feet above sea level and has the air quality of fellating the exhaust of a '93 Sentra. John Harkes once described seeing teammate Eric Wynalda cough up something that looked like a brownie during a match there. Their other match is in Guadalajara, which is only 5,000 feet above sea level. Teams having to ping in and out of these places will only help El Tri's case.

If they can win the group, they'll get a third place team in Azteca. If they get out of that cleanly, and again, they've only won one knockout match at this tournament ever, the last time they hosted it 40 goddamn years ago, it could very well be England walking into Mexico City. Now, the English in the sun and elevation in July in Mexico City is great for comedy's sake, but they're also one of the three most talented teams in the tournament.

If they biff the group a bit and finish second, their R32 game will be in LA, which is still a home game without the elevation but still the pollution, against Canada, or Switzerland, or maybe even Bosnia (sorry Qatar, I'm ignoring you after wasting all of our time four years ago). Get through that, and the Dutch or Japanese could be waiting in Houston, which would be another home game.

Prediction: I'm one of the biggest Mexico-agnostics, soccer-wise, around, but this tournament has come up in their favor. The group isn't all that hard, they'll be at home, with some real advantages, and unless a big boy really fucks up their group stage to finish third, they'll get a beatable team in the Round of 32 in their own special cauldron. I really want to see England-Mexico in the Round of 16, even though the match itself will be utter dogshit. The England fans in attendance will be a shade of red only seen on old NES games.

South Africa

Should You Care? One of the surprises of African qualifying, as they hadn't qualified for the tournament since 2002, though they hosted in 2010. They kicked Nigeria into the playoffs, from which they didn't escape. So they're something of the patented "good story."

Do They Care? Given that this is their first tournament in 16 years, probably a lot but with low expectations. Strange that we get the same opening match, in reverse, that we did in 2010. Still a shout that they can get out of the group, especially if three teams do so, thanks to the expanded format.

Any Dudes? Some local interest here, too, as the Fire's Mbekezeli Mbokazi is a likely starter for them in defense. Oswin Appollis was the main man in qualifying, with two goals and four assists.

How'd They Get Here? Came through Africa's pretty lengthy qualifying process automatically, topping usual powerhouse Nigeria by drawing them twice and finding five other wins out of the other eight games.

They Getting Out Of Here? Ok, maybe this section is a little silly given that everyone will have the same path out of the group. South Africa do get the one group game outside of Mexico, in Atlanta and indoors, which will probably be a nice break for them after the opener. They can jump up and bite Czechia there, and maybe one win is enough to get out.

Prediction: Not quite just happy-to-be-here, but not much else, either.

Czechia

Should You Care? Only a little. Czechia return to the World Cup after a 20-year absence, when those mid-2000s team were a heavy metal festival of fun. Rosicky, Nedved, Plasil, Baros, Koller, they should have won 2004 but got Greece'd (get it?) in the semis. This team isn't nearly as impressive, washing out in the groups of the last Euros, including that utterly bonkers match against Turkey where the ref had hallucinogens slipped into his water and brandished 19 (!) yellow cards, the Czechs finished with nine guys, and Turkey scored in injury time to send them out.

Do They Care? Basically, every European team is going to expect to get out of the group with this expanded nonsense, and Czechia is no different. A long absence from the tournament means that just arriving is something of an accomplishment. Also, Eastern European dudes in the Mexico sunshine...though that could turn in a bad way.

Any Dudes? Thomas Soucek is the midfield obelisk who just helped get West Ham relegated, though his forehead is a weapon in each box. Patrik Schick is a goal-machine for Leverkusen, yet seems to be the one regularly scoring Bundesliga striker that other teams don't want.

How'd They Get Here? Uninspiringly. They were in a qualifying group with Croatia, who were miles better than them, though they did manage a scoreless draw at home against them. The rest of the group was Montenegro, Gibraltar, Faroe Islands, so merely remaining upright for 90 minutes saw them grab second. They then beat both Ireland and Denmark on penalties to qualify, which is dramatic, but also a touch sobering, when it's soon discovered that both Ireland and Denmark suck eggs.

They Getting Out Of Here? They catch a break, in that they won't have to enter Azteca until the final group game, which means they can get their advancement taken care of before they have to chew whatever air they can find in Mexico City. A draw in their opener against South Korea and getting a win in Atlanta against South Africa would do it.

Prediction - A draw with South Korea in their opener is possible, given that this isn't the vintage version of South Korea. But this also feels like a team that coughs up a needless draw to South Africa in their second game, actually has to get something out of the last game in Azteca, and gets thwacked.

South Korea

Should You Care? Yes, because they have Son Heung-min, and he's my soccer Jarome Iginla, the player who never played for the team I love that I desperately wanted to, even while he regularly tore the team I loved to shreds. They also tend to be a lot of fun and play pretty fast.

Do They Care? Boy howdy. South Korean fans are ridiculous, and sometimes don't even stop for halftime. Sat next to their section for a game in France '98, my ears stopped ringing last week, which was definitely due to them and not the hundreds of shows I've been to and never worn earplugs for. YOU DON'T WEAR A RAINCOAT IN THE SHOWER.

Any Dudes? Son mentioned above. Lee Kang-in is one of the first off the bench for PSG, and gets some of the lower-profile Ligue 1 game starts. Lee Jae-sung is a nifty Bundesliga winger type. Hwang Hee-chan was more than serviceable for Wolves, if anyone on Wolves can be considered serviceable. Kim Min-jae isn't quite the disaster Bayern fans would have you believe, but he hasn't hit the heights in Germany he did in Napoli's defense.

How'd They Get Here? Kind of walked their qualifying group, not losing any of their 10 games, with six wins and four draws. Sticky patch in the middle there, where they drew with Oman and Jordan at home, but other than that, smooth sailing.

They Getting Out Of Here? Probably. They're almost certainly the second-most talented team in this group, and there's an argument that they're the first. But they're getting a touch older, with only Lee Kang-in in his mid-20s and in his prime. Most of them are coming off a long European season, and being chucked into the hair dryer of Mexico for a couple weeks is probably not what they need. They're the only team in this group that don't have to go into Azteca, though Guadalajara isn't going to be some breeze physically.

Prediction: Wrangle a draw with Mexico, after maybe something of a stubbed-toe draw against Czechia in the opener, and then beat South Africa to close it out and move on.